French Husband

I recently saw this meme and thought I would do it to show how different it is to be married to a Frenchman. Just today I read what I thought was a hilarious comic online called Sherman’s Lagoon. Sherman is a shark, married with one baby. They all have very human characteristics and personalities. This Sunday the “wife” says she has decided to get a catfish for a pet and her “husband” says he doesn’t want a pet. She says she has 51% of the vote in the marriage and, not only that, she can decorate the house as she wants and throw away anything of his that she wants. He says, “How can that be?” and she replies, “It was in your marriage vows. Look at the video if you don’t believe me.” The last frame has Sherman watching the video with his sidekick, a crab who says, “I can’t believe that you are going to say ‘I do’ at the end of this!” Sherman says, “I must not have been paying attention.” Anyway, it made me LOL as they say on the Internet. I showed it to Maurice and the first thing he said was, “A catfish?” He read the rest and just looked blank. I told him he was so French. We have the same humour about a lot of things but every once in a while I can really see the differences mainly because of our nationalities.

I’m leaving someone’s original answers from another source-I don’t remember who it was. My comments are italicized.

Here’s a chance to see how well you know your husband. Cut, paste and fill in the answers!

1. He’s sitting in front of the TV, what is on the screen?
Lifetime Movie
99% of the time it is sports. He loves all sorts. If something American is on he will watch it, if not, European sports-lots of skiing events, tennis and soccer.

2. You’re out to eat, what kind of dressing does he get on his salad?
Ranch
Vinigarette. Nothing else, ever. He doesn’t like balsamic vinegar either. A very basic eater.

3. What’s one food he doesn’t like?
He likes everything – easiest person to feed in the world
I thought he would like just about anything, being French. I mean they eat so many things Americans never do but there are quite a few things on his list. He doesn’t like tuna fish sandwiches-he wants the tuna on a salad. He hates cinnamon. He doesn’t like chinese food with a sauce.

4. You go out to eat and have a drink. What does he order?
Pork chops and a martini
Steak often and wine. In the States, it is totally different of course. Barbeque and beer for instance.

5. Where did he go to high school?
Verdugo Hills High
I have no idea. All I know is that he went to school in Paris and also in Nice. He has showed me the buildings but I didn’t retain the names. He had to board during the week when he was young and really hated it.

6. What size shoe does he wear?
10
8.5

7. If he was to collect anything, what would it be?
Coupons
Western movies on DVDs

8. What is his favorite type of sandwich?
Hamburger
Ham on a baquette

9. What would this person eat every day if he could?
Ice Cream
Chocolate candy (which he does eat every day)

10. What is his favorite cereal?
Oatmeal
He never eats cereal. He has some sort of bread with coffee-he puts confiture on his bread or toast and dips it into his coffee and eats it-a French custom.

11. What would he never wear?
a plaid shirt
A tie, since he retired. He never wears turtlenecks either.

12. What is his favorite sports team?
Tiger Woods (and USC, of course)
In the States, University of Texas. Here, some sort of French soccer team I think.

13. Who did he vote for?
Democrat down the line
Socialist, this being France.

14. Who is his best friend?
Steve V.
Jean Claude

15. What is something you do that he wishes you wouldn’t do?
Just 1 thing? Sleep late in the morning
Put his things away. I wish he would close doors when he goes outside. I can’t tell you how many times I find doors open with flies all over the place (in Provence).

16. What is his heritage?
Scotch
French and gypsy Hungarian. He was born in Nice.

17. You bake him a cake for his birthday; what kind of cake?
We’re back to he likes everything
He’d be happy with just about anything but loves a French fruit cake that I bake.

18. Did he play sports in high school?
Swimming
I had to ask him this as I didn’t know. They don’t do a lot of sports in schools here. He said he played basketball and soccer. He also played soccer outside of the school system with a club.

19. What could he spend hours doing?
Gardening
Watch sports on TV, read the paper. In Provence, fiddle around with the pool. He loves to keep it clean and sparkling.

20. What is one unique talent he has?
He’s unique in every way
Patiently fixing errors I have made on my computer. He makes a killer beef burgundy. I think the best thing is that he accepts me just as I am.

11 thoughts to “French Husband”

  1. This was fun to read, and to imagine my own answers. #20 is fabulous – I’m grateful to say my husband is the same. Aren’t we lucky. Make that blessed.

  2. Er, I should add … just the computers and accepting us as we are part … my husband is a vegetarian! Ha – but he makes a killer Risotto.

  3. My what a fun story…My husband doesn’t like sport much, only F1 and has for computers, he is never off the things…It is his job..IT Consultant for Williams Formula1 !!!

    Makes a good Curry, Chilli, and spag bol…a real meat eater too!!

    Oh yes put his things away, he is the worlds worst…drives me crazy!!

  4. He does have very “French” answers! LOL. Did he watch that Jean Claude movie “JCVD”? Supposed to be good.

  5. First, I LOVE that photo with the blue heart!

    Second, your Maurice sounds like a wonderful husband…and it was very interesting reading your answers. Hmmmm…like you, I thought that shark story was hilarious. But then, I’m not French.

  6. I printed out this picture of yours about 3 years ago and framed it. I see it every day in my living room. Love it!

    Are you in Provence yet?
    J

  7. Love the blue heart, Linda. I’ll have to try to fill in the blanks. Amazing-some of the answers I don’t know and I thought I knew a great deal about Bill…..more to learn.

  8. Hello, Linda,
    I found you through Poppy Fields. I also did this meme on my French husband. He likes the same sandwiches and has a hard time understanding my oh-so American sense of humor.

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